Posts Tagged ‘editing’

The Essential Word List for Lazy PR Writers

Saturday, December 17th, 2011

Words of Wisdom

Posted by Tom Gable

Media and PR gurus, news organizations, universities, social media sites and others are honing their annual reports on words most hated by the media in PR news releases and words that should be banned in 2012. Rather than wait, Gable PR compiled the following list from many sources including Inc., David Meerman Scott, Ragan, Lake Superior State University and others.

Sadly, some of the profession needs to be put into the slow class since the same words keep showing up (and have since 1999!). The list is in alphabetical order. The words receiving the most mentions over the years are in bold for easy reference. As noted here before, some words such as solutions and leading provider get dropped into news releases unconsciously, somewhat of a verbal tic. Lazy writers tend to rely on industry jargon and hackneyed phrases rather than striving to characterize a company, organization or individual in new ways that go beyond the ordinary.

During a Media Relations Summit several years ago in New York City, a panel of editors from The Wall Street Journal, Barron’s and other publications noted that many releases from companies in the same industry have a sad sameness to the language. They suggested that they could take many news releases and pitches received and do a global search-and-replace of one company’s name with that of a competitor and no one would know the difference. Whew.

How to avoid sounding alike? Think solid differentiation and positioning and compelling ideas. Then, run a search for the following words for deletion (and please add your own as comments!):

  • best-of-breed
  • customer-centric
  • cutting edge
  • end-to-end
  • epic
  • excited
  • first mover
  • flexible
  • innovate
  • leader
  • leading
  • leading edge
  • leading provider
  • leverage
  • market leading
  • mission critical
  • new and improved
  • new paradigm
  • next generation
  • outside the box
  • robust
  • scalable
  • seamless
  • solutions
  • state-of-the-art
  • synergy
  • thrilled
  • turnkey
  • unique
  • value-add
  • well-positioned
  • world class

 

 

PR University Panel Shares Secrets of Writing Like a Journalist

Monday, December 5th, 2011

Wordsmith at work

Posted by Tom Gable

How to cut through the clutter and connect with the media with powerful stories they can actually use? PR University convened a master class webinar recently to answer the question: “What kind of writer are you? Newsroom vets and PR wordsmiths share power secrets of writing like a journalist in six easy steps.”

The steps outlined by Jon Greer, moderator, were fairly straightforward. The PR pros on the panel then added extensive details to each step. Some of the highlights follow below with guidance from Nancy Brenner, senior vice president, director of media relations, MS&L Global Corporate; Jeff Crilley, president, Real News PR; Rory O’Connor, senior vice president and partner, Fleishman-Hillard; and yours truly, CEO, Gable PR.

Step one: be an internal reporter

Think like a journalist. Train your ears and eyes and find ways to rise above the competition.

Become an investigative reporter. In trying to earn our media coverage, we rely on telling a good story with facts. Can we truly differentiate against the competition? In what ways and can we provide ongoing proof of principle over the next two to three years with real stories, facts and details, not vague words.

Rory said the most important thing PR professionals can deliver is great content. How to connect with your ultimate audience, not your clients?

Nancy said to dig deeper and probe for better stories and anecdotes. She said to track trade organizations and associations in your client’s industries to find supporting data. They often have trend stories that the PR pro can build upon. Tom suggested using government, independent research and other outside studies for validation. In some cases, the PR pro can then provide the journalist with additional sources for improving the depth of the

Jeff said to push back on client who is trying to get too much of a commercial message into the release. Go for the good story and you will get the commercial, he said. Go for the overt commercial message first and you probably won’t get a story. He noted that the media are overwhelmed with added online and social media responsibilities so “do the job of the journalist” and help them tell a good story.

Step two: organize your material

Think of each release as part of a series. He were building image for the long-term. You’re thinking also about how people search for topics. Check what news stories and press releases come up as top candidates in the Google news and other searches. Look for what is they are, and what is not there.

What rises to the top? What is important? What is less important? What is unimportant?

Step three: start writing

To get started, Jon said to start with the first thing you think of; don’t delay or try to be perfect.

Tom recommended starting with a great headline. Think about search engine optimization. Tell your story concisely and with strong words. Read the media you are trying to reach. How would they write the headline? Think about your target audiences and what is important to them. Get creative. How are you going to stand out from the crowd?

In addition the perfect headline and work toward it. Stick to three or four major points and paint big pictures. Go for the most important fact first. Think about the benefits to their readers, viewers or listeners. Think about relevancy to the journalist’s audience. Are you offering any new insights? Can you provide examples, facts, metaphors, quotable quotes and good anecdotes to bring your story to life?

Step four: continue adding useful information

What does the reader or viewer need to know? Look for facts and outside validation. Can you enhance their understanding with government or other data? Can you quote outside sources, such as noted critics, pundits and authors?

Step five: review and revise

Applied the “so what, who cares,” test first. This is a good way to read through copy and see what could be eliminated, edited or enhanced. Will anybody care?

Jon said to set the work aside if you can and reread with a fresh eye after doing something else. Is anything missing? Is everything in the right order? Would a typical reader be confused? Nancy said good editors strive to tighten every sentence. The best reference book to guide you on the way: Elements of Style, by Strunk & White.

On quotes, Tom said to read your material out loud. Are you communicating well with each sentence?  Is your work rife with empty phrases?

Also, edit for jargon. Tom said some words, such as solutions, seemingly get dropped into news releases unconsciously, somewhat of a verbal tic. Lazy writers sprinkle the releases with jargon rather than striving to develop well-crafted, creative and compelling ideas that capture the personality of the company, its points of differentiation and the defining factors what it is offering.

On complex stories, Rory said to tell the story to friends. Have a dialogue. They will often find the holes.

Step six: work with an editor

Edit for both style and content. Is the story well told? Rory shares his copy with another former journalist at this firm. If you don’t have internal talent, turn to a friend or colleague on the outside. The outside viewpoint can sometimes be very helpful. Nancy said PR pros sometimes get too close to details of a story and produce jargon or “inside baseball” types of copy.

Nancy suggested writing for readers on smart phones, which is where more people are getting their news every day. Plan for a shorter word count, including shorter headlines. Can you edit your headline into a bright subject line?

Tom said an editor from the Wall Street Journal who made his copy significantly better said to never fall in love with your prose. Don’t take editing personally. Think about the final product. Is it really going to communicate with the audience – the ultimate test of good writing.

Mastering “The Accidents of Style – How Not to Write Badly”

Tuesday, July 5th, 2011

Words for the Wise

Posted by Tom Gable

This classic book by Charles Harrington Elster contains 350 of the most-committed errors in writing.  It starts with “every day or everyday” and strides quickly and eloquently through conundrums and confusing choices PR and news people face every day (this is correct!).  A few:

  • A lot or alot
  • Can not or cannot
  • Anyway or any way
  • Their, they’re or there (This includes a sample of the Elster humor that runs through the book: “There is no there there,” wrote Gertrude Stein in a rare moment of lucidity at the end of one of her notoriously incoherent sentences.)
  • Imply or infer
  • All right or alright
  • Be careful with Very
  • Avoid the lazy mechanical use of Basically (when you see an adverb, kill it; good tight writing has no unnecessary words)
  • Misuse of less for fewer
  • Overuse of Impact (The sad thing is that this powerful word, which traditionally connotes considerable force, has lost all its forcefulness through incessant repetition.  The only power impact has retained is the ability to cause a headache.)
  • Penultimate does not mean Ultimate or Final

Elster quotes several of the classic tomes, including “The Elements of Style,” “Simple and Direct,” “The Careful Writer” and the “Dictionary of Troublesome Words.”  He uses turns of the phrase and creative metaphors and analogies to make his points with clarity and humor. The book is highly recommended for anyone (versus any one) interested in honing their wordsmithing skills.

 

Say It in 140 Characters (Or Less!) – How Twitter Made Me a Better Writer

Monday, April 25th, 2011

Peerless Prose

Posted by Lauren Miller

Your assignment is to write a 1,500-word research paper on a topic of your choice. It’s midnight, you’re tired, you’re at 1,000 words. The paper is due in eight hours. Step one: find a Red Bull and chug it. Step two: dictionary.com and thesaurus.com. Step three: find 400 filler words and phrases. Sleep.

Every college student knows filler words and phrases are an easy ticket to reaching a word requirement on a paper. But in the working world, bosses want tight, concise writing that gets the point across. This means leaving old habits behind and learning how to communicate with clear, succinct messages laced with high-impact words, not air. In a recent Wall Street Journal article about graduate students, Diana Middleton noted that, “While M.B.A. students’ quantitative skills are prized by employers; their writing and presentation skills have been a perennial complaint. Employers and writing coaches say business-school graduates tend to ramble, use pretentious vocabulary or pen too-casual emails.”

Carter Daniel, business communication programs director at Rutgers Business School, said in the same article that, “M.B.A. students often have to unlearn bad behavior, such as using complicated words over simple ones.”

Enter Twitter. Twitter has evolved from a social networking site to a platform used by businesses, PR and marketing professionals, and reporters to connect with their audiences, promote their product or service, source queries, and give the reader a backstage pass to the inner workings of their favorite brands. All of this in 140 characters or less (which can be made more difficult if links are included).

Twitter has added extra discipline to my work as a PR professional and helped me become a better communicator. In honing rambling 20-word sentences to communicate a big idea or insight in 140 characters, I’ve learned how to cut the fluff, choose words wisely, get to the point and better pique my reader’s interest. The same approach is critical in PR when I’m working on a media pitch to connect via email, calling an editor, or drafting a press release. Less can be more. So for whatever the writing or communicating task, think in Tweets for starters. Then soar from there.

The Seven-Point Litmus Test for Creating Real PR News Stories

Thursday, February 17th, 2011

Going for P.1

Posted by Tom Gable

Today’s PR University teleseminar from Bulldog Reporter covered “10 PR Power Writing Tips: How to Create Compelling Copy That People Want to Read and Share.”

The panelists were: Michael Smart, national news director, Brigham Young University, and founder, Michael Smart PR; Nancy Brenner, senior vice president, MS&L Global Corporate, New York; Don Bates, APR, Fellow PRSA; academic director, Graduate School of Political Management, George Washington University; and Tom Gable, APR, Fellow PRSA, CEO, Gable PR. Jon Greer moderated.

I’ll provide more details later on some of the great tips from my fellow panelists in such topics as: be an internal reporter; know your audiences; word choice matters; always be concise; make news when you don’t have any; where’s the wow: rewrite, revise, repeat; and commit yourself to continuous improvement. Within that, yours truly covered the Gable PR seven-point litmus test we use as a starting point for issuing real news stories with topical, relevant information and evocative and provocative quotes. Here is the short course, adapted from an earlier PR University teleseminar and workshops at various PRSA and Counselors Academy conferences:

  1. Is it really newsworthy to anyone other than the company and, perhaps, the CEO’s family and a few friends?
  2. How big is the impact: company, community, region, market niche or category, industry, technology or science breakthrough, nation, hemisphere, humanity?
  3. Has the same or similar story already been told (quick database research will answer the question)?
  4. Can the premise be supported by valid data, third party sources, real case histories and ongoing proof of principle?
  5. Does the company have credible “gurus,” or spokesmen and women who can bring the story to life and become valuable and trusted resources for the media?
  6. Can the company be further differentiated by its people, technology, culture and personality? Or if you lined up all the companies in the space would they all look and sound alike?
  7. Can the story be summarized in a compelling headline, Tweet or one or two-sentence sound bite or elevator pitch? If posted through social media, will it generate interest and action (Re-tweeting, links, etc.)?

This quick test can help create a smart, compelling and interesting story or posting that breaks through the clutter, communicates to key audiences and supports the long-term image and reputation of your client or organization.  For tracking Tweets from the teleseminar use the hash tag: #bulldogpr

Editors panel: Online journalism standards lacking; no guarantees of accuracy, verification, trust

Sunday, September 19th, 2010

Daily and Sunday

Posted by Tom Gable

The title of the news panel was “It’s Not Your Grandparents’ Newspaper or Newscast Anymore” and although it occurred in San Diego with local media, one can find several lessons learned with broader implications:

        • - The ability to self-publish on the Internet has created a world where journalistic principles most likely don’t exist and readers now have the burden of determining what is journalism and what is not
        • - Evolving newspaper business models, with 24/7 reporting and fewer copy editors, has resulted in more errors
        • - The competitive nature of the broadcast media can creating feeding frenzies, such as the one experienced when the loon preacher in Florida threatened to burn a copy of the Koran on Sept. 11
        • - Viewers need to distinguish between entertainment shows and news shows
        • - Journalistic standards are lower with online media (or nonexistent)

The panel was held Sept. 17 at a biweekly luncheon meeting of the Catfish Club, founded by the Reverend George Walker Smith in 1970 to spur dialogue and understanding among different segments of the community. More than 70 attended, including community leaders, elected officials, retired Sheriff Bill Kolender and a couple of gadflies.

The moderator was Michael Grant, former columnist for the San Diego Union-Tribune and now journalism and media instructor at Grossmont College. He was joined by: Jeff Light, editor of the U-T (www.uniontrib.com); J.W. August, managing editor of KGTV (ABC affiliate, owned by McGraw Hill); Andrew Donohue, editor, Voice of San Diego, 100 percent online newspaper; and Leon Williams, now retired, the first black elected to the San Diego City Council and also the county Board of Supervisors, who has a long history of promoting positive deeds in minority communities.

Grant set the stage by noting that with the evolving world of self-publishing, there are no guarantees online news is journalism – accurate, verified and worthy of trust. He said in pre-Internet days, the news media acted as gateways to screen out the questionable, objectionable, unverifiable and other non-news. Now, with everyone being self published, journalistic principles may simply not exist. (I had one former editor hand back a daily business column written on deadline saying it wasn’t writing, it was typing; glad he was around to make it right.)

Grant, a droll former Texan, said the authors of websites, blogs and other self published information and mostly never been to journalism schools. As a result, it is now up to the citizens to have the burden of determining what is journalism and what is not.

Donohue said he sees “churnalism not journalism” because of the 24/7 news cycle being chased by media with smaller staffs and more pressure. He said if gatekeepers of old had been at work, the preacher who threatened to burn the Koran on Sept. 11 might never have been covered.

August, of Channel 10, said cable beats things to death. He also used the Koran story as an example. The cable news networks picked it up and it turned into a feeding frenzy. If they had just dropped it at the outset, August said, the story would have gone away. He noted the growth of fake news programs and the challenge of confusing real news with entertainment.

Williams said the media has a duty to be accurate. He told the audience that the reporters often ask leading questions (“Don’t you think it’s the end of the earth?”) and complained about reporters twisting things to create conflict. He said the media need to keep their feelings and prejudices out of the news and present the news as fairly and objectively as they know how (in whatever the format).

Light, recruited from the Orange County Register where had driven web-based initiatives, said the new owners of the U-T bought into a losing operation and now wanted to find a way to “improve lives and build a stronger community.” When the new owners arrived, they found an aging, shrinking and dissatisfied audience, Light said. They did research and people were interested in values and improved community coverage. Rather than do incremental changes, the U-T made major changes to give a strong signal to the community. This included a complete design overhaul and making website news coverage the driving force, with section editors later determining what should make the print edition.

On accuracy, Light said the time-honored process within the news business was to have reporters arrive at a different level of trust, based on experience. They would turn in their stories, which would go through the editing process. Does it ring true? Have the facts been checked? Then the story would print. He said news media hear quickly if the are wrong, or if not all sources have been used.

In answers to questions from the audience, he said they have reduced the number of copy editors at the U-T. It was a financial necessity. He said he was given a certain budget for reporting. Under the old news model, 40 percent of the staff covered the news and the rest was infrastructure, including copy editors and editors. Now, they’ve reduced the number of copy editors to increase the number of reporters in the field and improve community coverage.

There will be a spike in errors, he noted, but they will be cosmetic. The reporters are getting closer to each community they serve, which he believes will be well received. He said he likes the online comments to stories because they help the media learn. But he hopes to eliminate anonymous postings.

The panel agreed that online comments are great, but need attribution. Light said the blogs and the various voices with anonymous comments get into demagoguery. Donohue said online platforms can generate ranting. Since the Voice of San Diego changed to eliminate anonymous postings, the quality of the comments has gone up considerably. They also moderate the comments.

Grant noted that with anonymous comments, most of the harangues turn into people ragging the comments of others rather than the story.

Donohue said Voice of San Diego, the online paper, has a tight editing procedure. The reporter prints the first copy of the story and gives to Andrew to edit with a red pencil in the old-fashioned way. The reporter is then challenged to prove the accuracy of the story. As a third step, copy editors conduct fact checking. They also require that reporters to footnote their stories. The footnotes are hidden, but give the editors of the opportunity to research and learn more. On big stories, the material is sent to their lawyers. This diligence hasn’t prevented Voice from breaking some big stories in politics and education and winning awards. Its processes could provide a model for any legitimate media outlet, online or otherwise.

PR News Release Words to Live By (Not!) in 2010

Tuesday, January 12th, 2010

Jargon for the Ages

Posted by Tom Gable

We entered 2010 with the banished words for the year from Lake Superior State University, an impressive list full of toxic assets that were shovel-ready for burial. To build on this fine start, we thought it would be instructive to offer a quick historical perspective on words most hated by the media in PR news releases.

Some words such as solutions must get dropped into news releases almost unconsciously, somewhat of a verbal tic. Lazy writers sprinkle their releases with jargon rather than striving to develop well-crafted, creative and compelling ideas that capture the personality of the company, its points of differentiation and the defining factors of its offering. Instead, they issue something that sounds like a majority of news releases going out over the wires each day. A test: redact the company name, send to colleagues in other markets and see if they can identify the company. (more…)

Banished Word List for 2010 – Just a Start!

Monday, January 4th, 2010
Jabberwocky landing

Jabberwocky landing

Posted by Tom Gable

Lake Superior State University recently released its annual Banished Words List. First started in 1975, the list is culled from tens of thousands of nominations and includes the best of the worst from marketing, media, education, technology, politics and more.

Interested in contributing? Check their alphabetical complete list first. For the 2010 list, including comments from various sources, read on:

SHOVEL-READY — A cadaver? Potted plant? Suggestion: a project ready to implement.

TRANSPARENT/TRANSPARENCY — Cynics say it means politically invisible. (more…)

PR Releases Packed with Leaders Providing Solutions

Thursday, November 5th, 2009
It's about style

It's about style

 

Posted by Tom Gable

In looking for new content for a speech on jargon later this month, we set up news trackers to see how all the leaders of the world were doing in providing seamless, end-to-end, leading edge, next generation, turnkey solutions to whatever niche they serve. Amazingly, the results mirror those from the first similar survey a decade ago and five subsequent tracking surveys. Every other release on Business Wire and PR Newswire comes from a leader and most of them are selling solutions, rather than specific products or well-defined services.

David Meerman Scott in his Gobbledygook surveys and others, including yours truly, have written about this extensively. For this exercise, we’ve pulled a few choice clauses from PR news releases and company boilerplates and inserted below without attribution. Since they are all leaders, instant name identification should be easy. We do identify one company, because it deserves recognition for hitting the Trifecta, incorporating three great terms disliked by most media into its boilerplate: leading provider, seamless solutions and performance-driven.

The Trifecta!

AccountNet is a leading solutions and professional services provider focused on the financial and government sectors. AccountNet creates performance-driven, seamless solutions that add considerable value, and utilizes proven system-integration methodologies and expertise to help clients capitalize on their existing infrastructures successfully and cost effectively

Whew. What are they selling?

Now, on to more leaders in many niches, with a few comments for the good of the order. And if you can identify any of these, post a comment. The person identifying the most leaders will get an Amazon gift certificate for buying reference books on style, grammar and the new world of PR.

  • the world’s leading provider of high-quality lenticular large format and custom-printed plastics
  • creates performance-driven, seamless solutions that add considerable value (the daily double)
  • (the company) goal is to be an end-to-end service provider to its customers by furnishing customized and integrated “turn-key” solutions
  • a leading provider of affordable easy-to-use enterprise-class systems management software as a service
  • an industry-leading provider of end-to-end web hosting services (they could be seamless, too!)
  • an impressive suite of proprietary products and services to create seamless solutions that meet each client’s highly specific needs (meeting unspecific needs wouldn’t work that well)
  • leading provider of email traffic shaping software (my email is in bad shape; I could use a seamless solution from these guys to get it into shape)
  • a leading provider of electronic engines for the optically connected digital world (would love to know more about this niche!)
  • the nation’s leading provider of cleaner electricity and carbon offset solutions (wonder if the leader in dirty electricity can use some PR help)
  • the leading provider of turnkey virtual communications and virtual office solutions (we could use some real solutions)
  • world’s leading provider of WiMAX™ and wireless broadband solutions
  • a leading provider of advanced font products
  • a leading provider of hip-hop ring tones and mobile content (probably a crowded market where leadership is critical to success)

Companies and PR Firms: Thrilled, Excited With Just About Everything

Monday, July 6th, 2009

Posted by Tom Gable

As covered here recently, we are fortunate to live in a country filled with leading providers of just about anything. We should never have to settle for anything from the trailing provider category (Although we know of some CEOs who could actually agree to be positioned as a leading provider in the bottom 10 percent of the market).

Adding to the folly: many were “very excited” or “thrilled” to be making their announcements of anything from hiring a new sales manager for the adult diaper category, to bulking up a law firm’s litigation practice to reaching the half-way mark in recruiting candidates for a clinical trial (“We are thrilled to have reached the halfway point for enrollment in our XYZ trial…”). Imagine how thrilled they will be when they complete enrollment, conduct the trials and report results.

One dictionary defined thrilled as: feeling intense pleasurable excitement. And excited: being in a state of excitement; emotionally aroused; stirred. We are thrilled to report that use of these phrases fits into a category defined by the media as LAQs (or Lame Ass Quotes), which are usually found in the second or third paragraph of LARs (Lame Ass Releases), a growing category.

Gable PR research into news releases issued through PR Newswire and Business Wire in the past quarter turned up from 200 to 300 thrilled or excited companies a month from each service. The most common crime against clear communications: announcing a new hire. The CEO is always ecstatic because he or she has found someone that actually fit the job description (“So I am excited that Trisha (name changed) is joining our team and will lead Customer Operations. She brings a tremendous amount of telecommunications experience, a proven history of success and her energy and leadership will be invaluable.”).

A bank in California was very excited to be reporting its first profitable month after 26 months of operation. Imagine the thrills if they have a profitable quarter or, shudder, a full year in the black. Neighbors will probably call in the riot police and vice squad to quell the celebration.

CEOs, senior managers and deal makers with lazy PR people as unindicted coconspirators must lead largely dull lives when they become excited and thrilled about:

  • Adding a new vice president of sales in bathroom products.
  • Forging a strategic alliance in selling annuities.
  • Introducing a new software package that provides endless seamless solutions (this is another category to be covered later).
  • A new research collaboration to reduce toxicity in new drug compounds (picture the PhDs and M.D.s in their lab coats giving each other chest bumps and high-fives to celebrate the agreement).
  • Finishing shooting a TV commercial on psoriasis relief (…”we captured excellent footage and are very excited to move forward into post production.”). Look for a rash of press conferences to celebrate actual airing of the commercial.
  • Hiring a new vice president whose appointment “will enable us to build on our current successes and advance our position as a leading edge provider of solutions to the DEF market.”
  • Joining a company to do the job outlined by the recruiter (“I am very excited to be joining the team at MNO to help develop our new service offering that will enable companies and organizations with large market distribution networks to provide their customers with our PQR services.”
  • Launching a new Web site for an Indian casino, designed with “guests in mind” (one would hope). “We are very excited about our new eye-catching website… designed to provide an exciting, up-to-date gallery of all of our entertainment options and is dedicated to keeping our guests informed of every aspect of our fun-filled products” (Can we assume that previously the guests were largely uninformed?).
  • Rebranding a company (“We are very excited to give the company a new name. NAME is a culmination of the deep enthusiasm, energy and experience that we have for our industry, our clients and our community”).

The list could go on ad infinitum (or ad nauseum as the case may be). In future editions, we plan on arousing some senses by including the company and agency names of the leading providers of PR thrills and excitement. Stay tuned.